VOWS: Ways To Celebrate Your love

Each couple feels differently about the way they actually say/proclaim their marriage wedding vows. We have seen couples celebrate their vows in a few different ways. Below are a some ideas about how you are able to  share your vows with each other before your families and friends.

1-The celebrant/minister/officiant asks each one of the couple a few questions and each responds individually with “I DO” to the questions.

2-The celebrant/minister/officiant asks the vow questions to the couple as a couple and the couple responds together as a couple saying “WE DO” to the questions.

3-The celebrant/minister/officiant reads a few words and each one of the couple “Repeats” the words spoken by the officiant after the officiant, thus the statement: “Repeat after me”

4- The couple reads their vows to each other. This style has the couple focused on the reading of the vows holding the paper/card/book that the vows are written on. This presents challenges if the couple wants to both hold both hands and look into each others eyes. The focus becomes more on reading the vows than being focused on each other.

5-The celebrant/minister/officiant asks each party a question and each responds individually with “I DO” to the question OR the celebrant asks the couple the vow questions to the couple as a couple and the couple responds together as a couple saying “WE DO” to the questions. THEN the celebrant/minister/officiant reads a few words to each one of the couple individually and each individually “Repeats” the words spoken by the officiant.

6-Any combination of the about that will work the best for the two of you.

We strongly encourage not to share your vows from memory since the focus of “wanting to remember the vows perfectly” creates further anxiety by of not wanting to make a mistake if will the vows be remembered correctly. Speaking the vows from memory often becomes the focus, so much of the ceremony is missed due to the worry about “getting the vows right and will I remember them”.

We hope you have enjoyed your visit and this has been helpful.

Charlie and Cheryl Cavalconte
Wedding Celebrants, Ceremony Script Writers, Consultants
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We are extremely pleased to have Caitlin Nash, MPH, RD, LDN join us to help prepare you and your body for the big day. Cait is a Personal Trainer, Registered Dietician & Beachboy Coach.
Please visit her exciting websites. Let her help you become a healthier you:
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Why no images on our blog?  Wedding images come and go and there are so many and so varied. We feel it is the words you share with each other, during your wedding ceremony, that are some of the most significant and intimate words you will ever share and, like gems, are personally yours.

Weddings at the State Beach

Many of our recent sharing on this blog  have been readings used or could be during wedding ceremonies; however, as the summer is quickly being packed away in the north, Wedding Season 2016 is already off the ground for so many couples and families. So, we feel this is a great time to comment about weddings in the park, at the beach and other public places. We will comment about the location of your wedding ceremony  again since the place of the wedding ceremony extremely foundational to the entire celebration!

This past weekend in the USA was the weekend after Labor Day, traditional the beginning of the Autumn Season in the USA. However, the month of September provides beautiful summer like days in the Northeast and New England where many people continue to celebrate many summertime events, for instance RV camporee!

So, one of our state beach stories: the couple thought it would be wonderful to have their wedding ceremony celebrated at the ocean state beach the weekend after Labor Day when they expected things would be a little more quiet. They choose the Saturday after Labor Day thinking they would have the beach mostly for themselves, their families and friends. However, they did not check the calendar of events at the State Beach. So, imagine their surprise when they arrived at the place for their celebration at the state beach and were they were greeted by hundreds of RV’s and campers celebrating a wonderfully warm and beautiful Saturday afternoon in September!

The wedding ceremony went very well and as planned, nestled in the dunes, however, with the addition of a few hundred unexpected well wishers. The campers were a great help directing traffic and guiding guests to parking areas. They were very respectful in keeping an appropriate distance during the ceremony, however, when the couple came over the hill from the sand dune, after the ceremony, the couple immediately became rock stars for the day! Hundreds of campers welcomed the couple with cheered of joy and clapping welcoming the newly wedded couple into the state of marriage. All went well that afternoon, making the celebration all the more memorable, however, the moral of the story, if you do not want to have hundreds of unexpected guests at your wedding and a similar surprise at your celebration, please, by all means, check the calendar of your venue.

All the Best.

Charlie and Cheryl Cavalconte
Please visit our other sites and like us, Thanks.
http://www.createyourownweddingceremony.com
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http://www.recoverysayings.wordpress.com

Why no images in this blog? We feel it is the words you share with each other during your wedding ceremony that are the most important part of your day.

When Tragedy Befalls a Wedding.

This past weekend Lakeville Pavilion, a very popular wedding venue in Foxboro, MA, not far from Gillette Stadium home to the NE Patriots, where we have celebrated many weddings, had a massive fire during a wedding, destroying the venue, and subsequently the dreams and plans of many, many couples for this season and next. Our hearts go out to all who have been touched by this tragedy.

So, what would you do, if a tragedy like, death, fire, accident, sudden hospitalization, or something similar occurred to you or your family? As wedding officiants, we have unfortunately shared in a few of these tragic experiences and they are emotionally devastating to the couple and their families. Naturally, most people do not like to speak about these events, however we feel it worth noting.

First, and gratefully, the statics for these incidents occurring are very rare. Second, from our experience, these tragedies have been the opportunity for a couple and their families, to put their best foot forward. It did not matter whether the families were rich or poor, sophisticated and educated or not, across the board, the families stepped up to the plate and made the most sincere and genuine contribution to ease the pain, as best as they possibly could, during these sudden and tragic times. These are not the times to blame any one for anything. These are times for compassion and comfort, for understanding and sensitivity. These are the times for love to be the profound healing presence necessary in the life of the couple, the families and the guests. Each circumstance is different and is experienced differently by each person involved. We personally feel it is essential to come together and not to isolate; others want to be present and supportive to those hurt by these events. We believe people are good and want to be helpful. In these sad times, please, come together with family and close friends, some food, not too much wine, and have time together. Allow the pace to slow down to be together, to listen and consult with each other in order to make the best decisions given the circumstances. Please, forget past family resentments, they are useless. Breath. Let the silly, foolish and sometimes thoughtless things people say, in their feeble attempts to ease your pain, go. If you pray, invite your higher power into the situation. No one wishes a tragedy on anyone, least of all a bridal couple days or hours before or after their wedding, however, if unfortunately the moment arises, watch how the power, spirit and sensitivity of love, healing and compassion rises from the hearts of good men, women and children, who care, love and are instruments of peace.

Charlie and Cheryl Cavalconte

http://www.weddingministersri.com

 

Who is walking you down the aisle?

This is easily one of the most hotly contested subjects at the wedding rehearsal and later after the ceremony. Almost every person who has thought about getting married somehow sees him or herself walking down the aisle one way or the other. But how?

Our blog for today will consider the more traditional wedding. More often than not the male groomsmen, with the groom (Partner A), enters the ceremony site somewhat unceremoniously from the side and stands at the top of the aisle at the ceremony site, waiting for the balance of the bridal party to arrive: grand parents, parents, brides maids and then the bride (Partner B) walks down the aisle. So now the question: who is going to walk the bride down the aisle? There are several options: the most traditional is with dad or a male member of the family, then there area few other options: mom and dad together, whether bride parent’s are divorced or not. The bride walking with her children, regardless of whether the children are older or younger. Then, there is the bride coming down the aisle by herself. Lastly, a sort of new trend: bride and groom walk down the aisle together fully representing what the celebration is about: The two of them getting married to each other.

We would further like to suggest the language of “giving the bride away” as really no longer a fitting or even an acceptable phrase since it comes from a time when marriages were arranged and women were consider chattel. We have had many conversations with professional women: doctors, nurses, lawyers, college professors, company presidents, and founders, teachers, etc.: women who have been very successful in the worlds of business, academics, arts and science and yet some how have been talked into feeling the need to be accompanied and walked down the aisle. We ask the question: What does walking down the aisle accompanied by another “giving you away” say or symbolically represent? Is this a message you want to present? We pose the question for conversation.

Yes, there are traditions, however, how do they speak to this generation?

Tulle and The Outside Wedding

We love tulle (for the guys: this is pronounced “tool”, so when you hear the word, don’t think work). This is a wonderful fabric and naturally the fabric most often thought about when couples or mothers and daughters start thinking weddings, dresses, veils,  ceremonies and decorating. Tulle has many wonderful uses. Additionally, the cost of tulle is very reasonable. Wrap ordinary chairs with tulle and you immediately have a special environment. Drape it from chair to chair. Hang it over the railings. It is a great material and easy to use. Some of the most beautiful dresses we have seen are layered with tulle. However, we raise this consideration: some environments are more tulle friendly than others. A wedding ceremony and reception inside, is usually tulle friendly.  If, however you are having your wedding ceremony and reception in a garden or mostly outside you may want to consider the season and the bug population. Remember tulle is essentially netting and a tulle dress might not be the best outside choice. We have seen a fabulous bridal dress of tulle at a magnificent garden wedding catch and trap gnats and flies much to the consternation of the bride. In most cases, some bug repellent will take care of this issue. So as with so many things about your ceremony, consider the conditions of the outside environment.

Charlie and Cheryl

http://www.weddingministersri.com

Now is the Time to Start Planning

Now that the holidays are over, the Superbowl is won, and the red glow of Valentine’s Day is fading, and many are now  in the place to really “buckle down”to start the planning process for “the big day”

In our blog we are going to reflect upon our experiences as wedding officiants who have celebrated about 1700 weddings ceremonies: big and small, inside and outside, in churches, at clubs, at beaches, on boats and more, mostly in Rhode Island, Cape Cod, South Coast Massachusetts, Westchester County and Long Island, NY. I mention the locations since NYC, Metro NY/NJ and RI are some of the most expensive place in the United States to have a wedding as such we have celebrated a very broad spectrum of wedding ceremonies.

We hope our experiences will benefit you in planning your big day. There is no set order to the topics we will be sharing, about, it will be more or less what the muses dictate, so enjoy.

We ask you also to bear with us and our social media foibles since we continue to be on the learning curve. So please like, share, follow, tweet, etc. etc.etc. Thanks. We also look forward to hearing from you.

Have a great day.

Charlie and Cheryl

www.weddingministersri.com